Having a child changes everything. Until you have a child, it is impossible to understand the connection. Once you do, you cannot escape it. I have discovered this bond is not just emotional. I think it is physical, as well. It must be, and I will tell you why.
One of my children has diabetes. There is not a moment he is not on my mind even when I do not think he is. When he walks in the room, the disease surrounds him. I see it like an aura he cannot elude. When he tests his blood sugar, I wince, even when I am not with him. I know when it is near the time for a meal, he is reaching for the little bag he takes with him everywhere. I realize that when he feels a dramatic change in his blood sugar, he reaches for the bag and hopes he can get the answer in time. Is it low? Is it high? He carries his insulin and Lifesavers with him wherever he goes. Lifesavers. Who would have thought the name would turn out to be so prophetic?
Every time the phone rings, he crosses my mind. Will this be the phone call? Is something wrong? The truth is, there has not been one of those phone calls since he was diagnosed, but that does not change anything. He is only 17 and getting ready to graduate high school next year. He is still my baby, so when the phone rings, I jump, and I guess I always will.
I am amazed at his courage. He has not let it stop him or, even, slow him down. He has been active in school activities, plays the saxophone, and ice skates. He has many friends, and they know his health is a bit precarious. They can tell when he is not feeling well, and they are very solicitous. They help him when he needs them, and care about him. As a mother, you cannot imagine how that makes me feel. As he moves out into the world, I feel relieved that he will surround himself with people who will be there for him, and I believe he will be safer for it.
Somewhere inside of me, I know he lives. That place is palpable. I know it is true of any parent-child relationship. It is just more powerful when a child is ill – especially with a chronic illness. For a long time, I feared I was indulging in some neurotic fantasy. I have decided that is not the case. I think it is, instead, something magical. Maybe he can sense how much I love him, and he will always feel that love. If he does, perhaps he will take care of himself.
I will always watch over him. I will try not to hover. I hope he will find that someone special who will take my place and keep him first in her heart. I know he will take care of her, too, because that is the kind of person he is. That is the best any parent can hope for.
Image by Luis Hernandez – D2k6.es
The author is an online instructor at The College City. She has a husband and three children who mean the world to her.
Hi!
Your child is indeed very strong and I will always salute him for that. I know that as a mom, even if you are not directly the one who has the illness, you will always feel what your child feels and it is never easy. You and your child will be included in my prayers. I hope you and your son will continue to stay strong.
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Cristian Stan Reply:
November 1st, 2012 at 10:36 am
Hi Ambernatchek! Hi, Sarah. Being a parent is tough, but now I know being a mom is tougher. Without strong women, this world would fall apart. So, thanks for existing, girls.
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Hey Amber,
I appreciate you for opening your heart in this post. Of course, the illness is not something to be desired, but the way, you and your son go through this is admirable and inspiring.
Well, I’m not a mom to understand exactly what you’re feeling, but being a son taught me about the existence of this connection mom-child, you are talking about. In many cases there is an unspoken communcation yet a very valid one.
Your son is strong! His illness is the teacher while his attitude is the healer.
This will only strengthen the relationship with your son!
Also, another thing to be appreciated here is your non-interference. You are always ready to help him but without hovering
I’m praying and giving thanks for his healing!
Blessings for you both,
Radu
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Alex Reply:
November 8th, 2012 at 8:48 am
Hi, I am not a mother too
, but whether your child is sick, the best way is to find a safe place for him. It’s a place where the child is allowed to be free, and we must understand them, because they are our little ones.
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As a mother, I clearly understand what you mean. Our kids are always on our minds and in our hearts. No matter how old they are, we worry about them and watch their every step, just like when they only made their first steps in their lives.
My best wishes to you and your boy. God bless you
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Beautiful post here!
I don’t have children yet but my girlfriend and I are expecting next year. Most of our friends, and family, do have children so I can easily relate to what you say. We often here words like “you’ll understand when you’ll have a child” or “once you’re a mother, you’re a mother for life”.
I guess the energy the drives mothers and fathers around the world is (or should be) love. And we all know that love doesn’t need any reason. That’s what makes it so beautiful.
It seems to be what’s between you and your child.
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As a mother of a seven-year-old diabetic every part of your post resounds within me. thank you!
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No one will EVER take your place Amber. No matter who he finds or what he does.
As a child of an amazing mother and one who is head-over-heals in love with the most beautiful and caring girl on Earth (yes, I checked them all) I can tell you there is a special place in my heart for my mother that is impenetrable!
You son has that place for you.
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While I’m not a mother, Amber – I have been a son to a wonderful mother who I unfortunately had to watch fight and lose a battle with cancer. There is not a connection like the one a mother has with her child, and for some reason it’s even more powerful of a relationship that a mother has with her son, for some reason.
Your son is a very lucky young man. I have a good feeling though that he knows it. Cherish every moment the two of you have together. Even when he thinks he’s outgrown it, what he’s really saying is, “Love me more.” I promise.
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Amber, let me tell you, you’re son is not the only strong one here. While I admire him for being strong and not letting his disease get in the way of his life, I admire your strength as well. I hope you know that. You’re a great mom and you’re strong for allowing your son to live the way he wants even when you’re so worried about him. Kudos to you and your son!
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What a beautiful story…there is no stronger connection between mother and child. You are very blessed to have this…it is a truely beautiful thing.
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There is a lot of diabetes in my family too but I don’t have a child with it. May you continue to feel strength.
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I clearly understands that you share. I appreciate you for open your heart with us. Keep sharing dear.
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As a mother,you have to be concerned about your kid especially if they are being faced with such a situation. You just cannot resist the emotional attachment to the kid even when they are mature and married. I hope he finds someone who takes proper care of him too.
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I commend your strength and that of your son. May it grows further. Thanks for sharing such inspiration.
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Thank you for your informative article, that you went to a lot of time and trouble to write so as to provide people with free information. It explained everything I needed to know and I appreciate your time.
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Hey Ambernatchek, this was really deep and interesting to read. I could not even begin to imagine how you feel, but I know that to every real parent in this world, their children are always on their mind no matter the time. My job is a bit un-safe and sometimes, I wonder if my parents become afraid the phonecall might be the really bad one. They don’t like me to call after midnight because late night calls aways scare them that it’s going to be something bad when they pick up. Anyways, my mom has diabetes and throughout the day she is on my mind, but I know she will be smart and sometimes I have to remind her of somethings, but only cause I love her.
Best Wishes,
William Veasley
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This article its talks about the Childs that changes everything, this is really cool topic..
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I wish you all the best in the world. Stay strong, whatever happens.
My thoughts are with you.
From Germany,
Günni
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Fatima Hipolito Reply:
November 11th, 2012 at 5:16 pm
Yeah that is the best wishes, have a strong and good health..
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I appreciate you for opening your heart in this post.Being a parent is tough, but now I know being a mom is tougher. Without strong women, this world would fall apart.My best wishes to you and your boy. God bless you
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In this article you have displayed the passions of a mother. All mothers are very caring for their kids and their is no alternative to caring mother.
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Hi Ambernatchek,
I don’t want to say nothing more about this article. As this article is interesting as also its so heart touching.
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I wish God gives your family more strength and love and I believe that your wish will come true and we can achieve anything if we pray with true heart and love. After a long time, I’m finding the true meaning of life at “growwithstacy” #Respect.
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So beautiful! You son has to be proud of his mommy, and I’m sure that there is a close and special relationship between you, deeper and more special than usual. It is so good that he hasn’t got introverted because of the diabetes, my cousin had got neuropathy symptoms caused by diabetes…
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I appreciate the strength with which your son is going ahead in life. Sometimes we get accustomed to live with our imperfections and difficulties. It needs a great deal of strength to do this. I had asthma from childhood and it took lot of courage on my part to start considering it as a part of my life although my mother’s situation was akin to yours. I hope God blesses you both with tremendous strength to live with joy.
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Thanks for this very inspiring share! I wish you and your family all the best and may you continue to be the empowered parent that you are amidst the challenges you and your child are confronted with everyday.
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My daughter is the love of my life and there’s nothing I won’t do for her, I truly understand how you feel. Remember to continue praying for strength and guidance and this too will come to pass. Thanks for sharing!
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts, you definitely moved me in more ways than one. Being a mother is such a great privilege, I wish you all the best!
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Juvenile diabetes is simply frustrating, but I admire your courage to share this experience with your readers. It is not easy living through life with a child who suffers from it but you made everything sound like it’s easy.
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Words cannot vie for the beauty of your revelation. Thank you once again for inspiring your leaders, and letting us know that we don’t have any lame excuse to life’s challenges because we can definitely face them.
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Thank you for sharing this wonderful post to your readers. In one way or another, your child will realize that whatever he does, someone is watching over him and loving him more than that person loves her own self
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This is a good post in inspiring people how it changes the perspective of a person, they give strength, priceless smiles. Thanks for opening story.
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It’s kind of a sad read Stacy, it’s a beautiful post but don’t be sad about stuff like that.
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Your child is blessed to have a wonderful Godsend like you to be his parent. Keep up the good and noble work!
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I came across this article today researching diabetes in teens. I had tears in my eyes. What a beautiful, heartfelt story of a mother’s love.
As a mother of two kids (18 and 12) – I can honestly say – that being a parent is indescribable.It’s a gut-wrenching love that goes deep into your soul. When I was young, I thought I didn’t want children. I saw my mother struggle as a single parent – and thought…. “too tough…. not doing it”.
I am SO glad I did. They changed my life for the better. They changed me for the better.
-Kelly
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Hi Ambernatchek,
Thanks for sharing inspiring post with your readers.I strongly believe god gave strength and love to you and your family.if we pray with true heart and love then god will bless your family more.
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Very good points! thank you very much to you Kayla and for Veronica, I really needed to read that!
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Hi Amber,
This is such an inspiring post and thank you for giving us the feeling of how lucky we are to love our children and being loved by our parents.
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As a father, i think your child is very brave, my child always in my mind too! My best wishes to you and your boy!
Abendkleider Kurz
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