This is the second part of a two part series on creating meaningful Facebook connections.
In the first part we discussed how to create meaningful relationships with people that we are already connected with. If you missed it then I highly recommend that you give it a read.
A great place to start when building connections is with those that we have already established a connection but have neglected for a while.
Today we are going to discuss how to create meaningful connections with total strangers on Facebook. Do you know how to find a total stranger and connect with them in a meaningful way on Facebook?
If not then read on and you will learn some tools to do exactly that. If you already know how to create connections in this way you may learn something new or have something valuable to share with the rest of us!
Remember that in order to create a meaningful connection you must take time and go through the proper steps. If you move too quickly you will scare people away in the same way that you would scare someone off if you proposed marriage on the first or second date!
1. Establish Commonality
When you are attempting to create a meaningful connection with someone completely new on Facebook the first thing that you want to do is to establish what you two have in common.
This is a sample message that you can send someone: “Hi there, I see that you post a lot of great insights on the Power of Positive Thinking group! I love your last comment about… because… I love connecting with people who hold the same mindset as myself! What do you do for a living?”
You can use anything that you’d like to build commonality. If you find them on a group then that is an easy place to find common ground. Find whatever it is and use that as a way to build the foundation of your connection.
Spend time thinking about where you want to find people to connect with because the more you target them for your market the more likely that you will be to find someone interested in your business. You may be very involved with a community about training ferrets but that may not be where you want to start if you are looking to build connections for your business. A group or fanpage designed for entrepreneurs would be a better target market.
2. Get to Know Their Struggles or Accomplishments
Next you want to start building a relationship and get a feel for where they are. By asking questions you can find out if they are someone who is struggling with a lack of money and time who you can help in some way. You can also find out if they are doing well and someone that you may be able to help you with your business.
Let the conversation go back and forth a bit and ask them a lot of questions about themselves to find out the answers to the questions that you are looking for. Remember that you are not looking to bring every single person into your business, you are looking for people who are open to your business or to possibly helping you.
3. Be Complimentary and Engage
It’s important not to just fire a bunch of questions at the person because that is obviously not connecting with them. This is all about meaningful connections.
Give them honest compliments, never give a fake compliment because people usually see right through those. Remember, you’re not trying to butter them up. You are trying to engage with them and provide value and create a connection. People tend to like those who like them so if you look for things to like it will warm up the connection all the more.
Don’t limit yourself to only interacting with them on the messages or chat. Respond to their posts, like their statuses, etc. Don’t go overboard and act like a stalker, just be friendly and be yourself!
4. Wait for Them to Start Asking Questions
It won’t be long before they turn around and start asking you questions about yourself – unless you’ve scared them away! People tend to reciprocate relationally so if you ask questions about what they do or dreams that they have they will likely ask you the same questions in return.
When they do give a brief explanation of what you do, leave room for curiosity and they will really start asking you questions. One tactic that is effective is to respond with something that creates curiosity and finish it with, “…but I’d really like to hear more about how your business does…”
Another thing to note is that you should never give out a link for your business unless they directly ask you for it. You can mention that you have a link you that you could share with them but don’t share it until asked!
What are your thoughts? Please share in the comments!
To Your Success,
PS: Please share and tweet this post!
Thank you for reading! I'm Stacy, the owner of this blog. You can learn more about me here.
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Commonalities with positive intention always open door for new relation. Allowing the community person to questions makes you popular among the folks.
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Stacy Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 3:02 pm
Yes, those two aspects do open people up for new connections!
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Hi Stacy, I’ll be honest here, these tips can be used on many situations and social media sites, the same can be said for Twitter, Blog Engage, Facebook, the fact is these are keys to building relationships. This is one of the greatest things about your content and tips. I find you can benefit from applying them anywhere in life let alone Facebook. I have experienced your last one a lot, if you let them the questions will come and the sales process starts. Were always selling something, an idea, an, image. Life is always about selling something to someone.
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Stacy Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 3:04 pm
Hi Brian,
You’re right, those are tips that are easily applied to other social media sites because at their heart they are about connecting with people. You’re also right that we’re always selling something, I’m reading a book on the topic now.
Stacy
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[...] truly think we can all benefit from reading and subscribing to her blog. Ger latest article named, How to Create Meaningful Facebook Connections With Total Strangers is a really great read and like I mentioned in my comment can be used in so many places and not [...]
Hi Stacy, thanks for these useful pointers. In a way, I think social media has made us a bit lazy in “learning the art” of conversation and connecting meaningfully with others”. Its too easy just to click a thumbs up or like a like button..so it was good to read your five steps. Take care and enjoy your day.
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Stacy Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 3:30 pm
Hi Ntathu,
I think you have a point! It does make it easier to be lazy when relating to others!
Have a great day!
Stacy
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Hi Stacy,
What great advice and tips! A lot of your advice in this post goes further then what most people tend to do, which may be the reason some people stop short of reaching their relationship-building goals. Brian is right, these strategies can be implemented in many more social media platforms than just Facebook.
Sound advice Stacy! Thanks for the great read!
Melissa from MelissaAgnes.com
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Stacy Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 4:47 pm
Hi Melissa,
Thank you! I think it’s because it’s all about *relationship* marketing that the tips are so universal!
Stacy
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Hey Stacy!
Love this advice!
I think if you start your strategy out with full on engagement; as in asking questions, being conversational & truly being interested in THEM, then you’ll grow an amazing community.
Great stuff!
Morgan@Sociable Boost invites you to read… Train Your Social Media Team in Your Business FIRST
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Stacy Reply:
March 20th, 2012 at 5:28 pm
Hi Morgan,
Thank you! That’s very true, it will turn into a community!
Stacy
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Hi Stacy,
I agree with Ntathu, ‘Liking’ a photo or post is like saying agreeing to a point without giving any reason in ‘real life’. Even when we are already communicating or engaging via online platforms, the basic fundamentals of how we should treat each other must still be there – a person talking to another person.
Have a great day!
Cheryl
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Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 7:36 pm
Hi Cheryl,
That’s very true, we are still dealing with real people and we can’t forget that!
Stacy
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Hi Stacy..
Your post is inspiring..
Social Media made our life easier..
Thanks for your post..
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Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 7:36 pm
Thank you, Bianca!
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Hi Stacy…
Nice tips social media is great way to make good relations with total strangers I also make many Facebook friend that didn’t know me but when we start conversation they really help me in blogging.
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Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 7:40 pm
Hi again Rizwan,
Yes it does help with blogging too!
Stacy
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Hi Stacy, after I read this post my plan was to use this steps to reach out to someone who left a comment here. Ironically I seem to know everyone who has left a comment so far. I’m going to blame that one on Brian – it’s all his fault for bringing us together on Blog Engage LOL!! Great post Staci, I’m going to put these tips to good use.
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Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 7:55 pm
Hi Ileane,
That’s funny!
Yes, I would blame Brain for sure! 
Stacy
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Hello Stacy1 Great thoughts here. It’s amazing how Facebook (or internet for that matter) bring complete strangers together and make connections, not only professionally but sometimes in a more personal level!
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Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 7:58 pm
Sandra,
It is amazing! Almost a year ago I posted about how I became very close friends with a lady online and how much her untimely death impacted me. The internet does have the ability to really connect people in deep ways.
Stacy
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Stacy,
Connecting with staggers on Facebook is much like trying to connect with strangers anywhere else. It just is a bit different in that you are missing their body language. Thanks for the tips! I have found it is always more safe to hand out the bait and wait for them to initiate. And I agree with you that there is nothing that breaks the ice better than finding common ground and a genuine complement.
~Becca
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[Reply]
Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 8:01 pm
Hi Becca,
I agree with the body language. I think that’s why a lot of people find that they have more miscommunication issues on Facebook. I’ve seen some doozies!
Stacy
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Correction strangers…
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[Reply]
Stacy Reply:
March 27th, 2012 at 8:03 pm
I knew what you meant!
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Hi Stacy,
I think the main point, that makes everything else work is to be genuine. You need a yearning for the company of other people, and you have to be yourself. Trying to be all things to all people might work for a Target website, but you could lose yourself if you tried to do that in the blog setting. Then again, maybe the Target people have lost themselves?
Lou
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[Reply]
Stacy Reply:
March 28th, 2012 at 6:45 am
Hi Lou,
You hit the nail on head there, we must be genuine!
Stacy
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Stacy,
One of my best friends in high school could start a conversation with AN-Y-ONE! Not only could he initiate the conversation but he had a way of making you love him before the night was through. One technique, that’s in line with your strategy, was his search for common friends.
Question 1: What school do you attend?
Question 2: Do you know “So and So?”
He would repeat step two until he figured out a number of people that they both knew. If not people, it would be interests or places to visit. I was amazing to watch.
In any case, I just wanted to share that brief example.
Have a great weekend!
Damond
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Damond Nollan Reply:
April 7th, 2012 at 9:31 pm
….”It was amazing to watch.” Not “I was…”
Damond Nollan invites you to read… Be More Proactive Using These Four Tips
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Stacy Reply:
April 11th, 2012 at 4:05 pm
Damond,
Thank you for sharing those examples! It’s always helpful to have a lot of questions ready because what works with one person won’t always work with another.
Take care,
Stacy
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Hi Stacy,
Well said. The point you made a the end is so important about links. Give it when asked for it! Boy, this is a post for FB! FB has become a sea for entrepreneurs to swim in but some are swimming incorrectly!
Thanks for 4 great points that will always produce results if done, as you said, correctly. Success is so simple until we muddy it up!
Best,
joe
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Stacy Reply:
April 11th, 2012 at 4:08 pm
That’s true, Joe. Thank you for stopping by!
Stacy
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Thanks for these great tips Stacy! Your previous posts taught me all about tribes- I had no idea!
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Stacy Reply:
April 11th, 2012 at 4:18 pm
I’m glad to help!
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Hi Stacy,
Your tips are very useful for those who are over eager (desperate)to hold their horses a bit.The most common things are always the most easily overlooked.
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Thanks for your pointers. Technology has definitely changed the way we communicate and relate to each other.Trying to establish good relationships on social media networks such as facebook and twitter requires more than the usual exchange of likes, it takes time and effort to be able to say that a connection is actually present.
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Connecting with anyone and everyone has now become effortless with the advent of networking sites. I certainly believe that it takes time to establish any kind of relationship and must never be done in haste. This post is an interesting find. Thanks!
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Hi Stacy! Very nice article by the way. Bottom line is that, in order for you to establish rapport and a meaningful relationship with someone on Facebook, you’ll have to be honest, genuine. But be wary of posers though, they’re thriving on the site!
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Hi Stacy,you have shared very useful tips in harnessing social media in driving traffic to one’s site. I look forward to sharing my feedback on these points you’ve shared in the article.
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This touches on some of the things not normally mentioned in other articles.
Possibly because this takes a bit more effort, and you have to be consistent and real.
However, I believe it will be way more advantageous both in the short term, and for sure in the long term. Thanks for the food for thought.
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